Caffeine as a Drug

I quit coffee about two years ago. I drink a cup of green tea each day instead, which I've learned to love, and which keeps my teeth the English shade of yellow I've come to lean on to repel women and cameras.

However, as a treat, specifically in business meetings, I treat myself to a cup or two of coffee.

Turns out to be quite a treat. I've tried cocaine a few times, but cocaine has nothing on caffeine after a long withdrawal. Caffeine lasts much longer and has a far more productive, mood-improving result for me. I'm brighter, happier, and faster. There seems to be no down side except for getting addicted to it, which leads to tolerance, which leads to higher doses, which leads to GI tract issues, and eventually virtually zero benefit, all of which happens after a month or two for me.

If you're really into coffee, I recommend this as an insanely powerful recreational drug:

1. Give it up permanently.
2. Pick a day (no more than once every few months) to go nuts.
3. Have a small meal.
4. Pound a double cappucino.
5. Witness the joy.